Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Real Life Mom

I find myself fighting off resentment of "celebrity" moms being applauded by the media.

Let me start by saying this. My choice (and it was a choice even though, for me, there was no other path) to leave my full time job that paid fairly well to stay home with my son is one many mothers face. In no way am I just a stay at home mom, because I do so much more. I am a mother, a housekeeper, a cook, a wife, a dog walker, a gardener, and that's just the things I take care of. There are things I do for me, though my time is limited. I have a small hobby/hopeful business.

No one helps me. I wish my mother were able to hold her grandson and give me advice. My father isn't in the picture. My husband's father is wonderful and is a fabulous babysitter if lil man is sleeping ;-). I adore him, but know that though he would help in an emergency, day to day would scare the bejesus out of him.

So when I hear how wonderful a "celebrity" mother is, how great she looks, and how she juggles everything, it actually makes me sad and sometimes a bit angry. These moms, as wonderful as I'm sure they are (yes, no matter what, being a mom is THE BEST!!), the team of people "helping" are what make this mom fabulous in an unachievable way for the average mommy.

The media applauding these women while forgetting about all the mamas out there that don't have all the things that money can buy is sad.

I didn't have a baby nurse. I stumbled through the first few months with my books, app, and husband. Nanny? Nope. No one to pass the baby off to as I went to get my hair done, work off the baby weight at the gym, or have a girls night out. Night out? I could barely stay up past 7 at night! No hair person, make-up artist, no stylist, or personal trainer.

I didn't get my hair done until my son was almost four months old. The dishes piled up more often than not, floors that desperately needed cleaning stayed that way longer than I would have liked, and social media became my touchstone to the outside world.

Date time with my husband? My "momjo"? I laugh.

Baby weight? That wasn't as hard thanks to breastfeeding. But toning it all back up? Not until almost a year and half later and I've learned how to juggle it all.

(And if you have all of this, go for it. But, can't we celebrate mommies who don't?)

To all of you mom's who do it all on your own, I celebrate you. Every day.

And, yes a teeny weeny part of of me may be a but jealous. But I wouldn't trade the time with my little man for any of those "helpers"...except maybe a housekeeper. Because that would mean more tickle time.

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